Freakaless!
by jordylilly777
Summary: What if the smartest villain and the most evil villain in Freakazoid! teamed up to destroy Freak, but to do that first they would need to destroy his powers. Will Freakazoid be able to stop them before it's too late? First Freakazoid story, Please review!
1. Chapter 1

**First Freakazoid fanfiction ever! I just recently discovered Freakazoid and I've never done humor before, so tell me what you think. Also I'm always open for ideas if you have any. I hope you guys like it, and don't forget to review! Please no flames, though constructive criticism is always welcome! On with the story!**

**I don't own Freakazoid. (Sniffles) **

**Freakaless!**

**Ch. 1 They Escaped!**

**Third Person**

The door creaked as the guard brought a new prisoner into the dark and humid jail cell. He wore a hooded cloak that reached his ankles and hid half of his face. As the door closed a new figure came out of the shadows, it was a man with a huge head that looked just like a brain

"Hello, I don't believe we've met. I'm the Lobe." The brain headed figure said.

"No, I don't believe we have. I'm Gutierrez."

"If you don't mind me asking, why are you here?" the Lobe questioned.

Gutierrez growled in frustration, "It was that buffoon Freakazoid, he makes me so mad! I wish I could just destroy him already!"

"I know right! Every time I think up a brilliant plan _he _of all people destroys it!" Lobe shouted.

They sat in an angry silence, when both came up with an idea.

Gutierrez looked at him with a sinister grin, "I know what we should do..."

**Dexter's POV**

I was in my room on the computer, as usual, when I heard a scream... well I guess it's time for Freak to take over.

"Oh... FREAK OUT!"

I spun around until I was no longer Dexter, I was blue, had black hair with white lightning bolts in it, and was wearing a bright red outfit. I sped... I mean Freakazoid sped off to save the screaming victim, and by _sped off _I mean him putting his arms up into the air and making whoosh noises.

Today's going to be a long day...

**Freakazoid's POV**

Whoosh! I flew off to save whoever was screaming, all heroically and stuff. Nothing shall stop me from saving that innocent... hey look! It's Cosgrove!

"Hey Cosgrove!" I yelled excitedly.

"Hey kid, wanna see and elephant in a pink dress?"

"DO I?" I yelled as loud as possible, while jumping into his police car.

"GO GO GO GO! LET ME MAKE THE SIREN NOISES! WEEE WOOO WEEE WOOO WEEE WOOO!"

* * *

><p><em>A few seconds later<em>

* * *

><p>"AWWWW! Look at that elephant in a dress! It's sooooo cute!" I said while looking over at a fat baby elephant in a pink tu tu.<p>

"Yep, it sure is kid." Cosgrove replied in a monotone voice. "Hey, there was a massive prison break and all of your enemies got away."

"Should I go put them back in prison?" I asked.

"I would, but that's just me."

"Hmmmm, okay. Bye Cosgrove!"

With that Cosgrove drove off in his police car, and I continued to "fly" off to recapture the bad guys.

* * *

><p>I just recaptured Cobra Queen and her snakes, Cave guy, and Candle Jack and I am now thoroughly exhausted. <em>Only three left freak. <em>I thought right as I heard creepy laughter; I turned to see Jasper coming towards me with his medusa watch.

"Want to see my new and improved invention of creepy and mysteriousness?" he asked eerily.

"NOOOOO! I'VE SAID IT BEFORE AND I'LL SAY IT AGAIN! YOU'RE A CREEP JEEPERS! GET OUTTA HERE WITH THAT WATCH! LAY OFF THE POOR PIGEONS, WILL YA? _SHEEEESH_! YOU'RE A CREEP! GO AWAY! I HAVE ENOUGH PROBLEMS WITHOUT HAVING TO DEAL WITH YOU, JEEPERS! _UUUUUUUUGH_! GO BACK TO JAIL, OR SOMETHING! BECAUSE I'LL TELL _YOU_ SOMETHING: _THIS IS A HAPPY PLACE_!"

He crawled towards a police car. Now all I have to do is... I looked around, seeing no one else there I decided to call it a job well done, and headed home. Not even noticing the sinister smiles of the two villains I accidently missed...

Buh Buh Buuuh!


	2. Chapter 2

**YAY! I LOVE LONG WEEKENDS! Thank you to Freakazette Raven, the first person to review this story.**

**I don't own Freakazoid… (Sighs)**

**Freakaless!**

**Ch. 2 The Evil Plan of Evilness**

**Freakazoid's POV**

I heard Dexter's voice yell freak out! Who instantly spun around and turned into me.

"FINALLY!" I yelled. I was inside of Dexter longer than usual today, and probably would have been in him longer if it wasn't for the date I have with Steff tonight. Speaking of which I better get going.

"Whoooooosh!" I "flew" off towards the dark and creepy alley I told Steff to wait for me in, but she wasn't there. I traveled deeper into the alley just to be sure. _Hmmm, that's strange… I wonder where she could've, hey look a note!_

"Dear Freakazoid,

Don't bother looking for your girlfriend

because she's not here. If you want to

save her come down to the old, creepy,

and abandoned factory at 6:00, don't

be late.

Sincerely,

The Lobe and Gutierrez"

I tapped my chin as I pondered the strange note, "Hey Freakazoid." I turned towards the voice.

"Hi Cosgrove!"

"You want to get a snow cone?"

"Hmmmmm…" _If you want to save her come to the old, creepy, and abandoned factory at 6:00__…_I looked at my watch 5:58."OKAY!"

_A few seconds later_

"Mmmmmm, I love snow cones…"

"Ya, hey you know that note you got?"

I nodded, "Well you have two minutes to get there, or else something bad will happen to Steff."

"WHAT!"

"Also it's right over there."

I turned my head to see a really creepy and old building… "RIGHT! DON'T WORRY STEFF, I'M COMING! Whooooosh!" I ran over towards the creepy building that was right next to the snow cone stand.

I slowly opened the door, and walked in. It was pitch black so I had to feel my way around the factory, I was doing this when I saw a glow in the dark X. I walked over to it to see what it was when… BANG! A cage fell right on top of me! _Note to self: a glowing X in a creepy old building where bad guys are is bad__…_

I attempted to break the jail bars, the key word being attempted. For some reason I couldn't break the jail bars…

"Why. Can't. I. Break. FREE!" I said while I ricocheted off the walls like a pin ball machine in my attempt to escape.

"Isn't graphite bars charged with negative ions your weakness, my friend?"

The lights suddenly turned on showing a man in a brown cloak…

"You know, you really shouldn't tell the bad guy what your weakness is…"

I turned towards the voice to see a brain headed figure…

"Aww, nutbunnies…" I looked around, wait a second… "Where's Steff?"

Gutierrez pulled her out from behind the curtain thingy ma bob so I could see her. "Don't worry, Freakazoid. She's right here."

Seeing her unharmed made me sigh in relief, sadly she was tied up and with two villains so I'm not too relieved.

I put on my macho man voice, "Let her go, you fiends!"

"No." they answered simultaneously.

"Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"No."

"Pretty please with a cherry on top?"

"Ummm, no."

"Hmmm… pretty please with a cherry on top and sprinkles and-"

"NO!" the Lobe shouted. "WE'RE NOT LETTING HER GO NO MATTER HOW MANY CHERRIES OR SPRINKLES YOUR PLEASE HAS!"

"Not even a little?" I asked.

"NO!"

We sat in silence for a few awkward seconds.

"So… why am I here?"

"You're here, my friend, to be destroyed!" Gutierrez smugly replied.

"How are you going to do that?"

This time the Lobe answered, "Simple, we're going to use this ray I invented." He pulled a sheet off of a big laser looking thingy.

"And then, my friend, we will use it to take away your powers so we can destroy you slowly and painfully." Gutierrez said with glee.

"Your such a weenie." I mumbled.

"I am not a WEENIE! YOU are a WEENIE! Lobe activate your machine!"

_Okay, Freak. Don__'t panic. Whatever you do, don't panic… _the machine started humming as it turned on, I frantically searched for a way to escape. _No way to escape! Okay, now I can panic._

The machine shot out a beam of light heading straight for me.

"AHHHHHHHH!"

**We interrupt this program to add dramatic tension.**

…

…

**Thank you for your patience. Now back to the show.**

WAM! The ray hit me full force. It felt like my skin was melting off the rest of my body. The few seconds it took to hit me felt like hours, I fell to my knees in pain. Finally it ended. I caught my breath; my body was still tingling from the pain it just experienced. I heard the cage door creak open. I wearily looked up at the big weenie.

"Now are you feeling weak, my friend, oh so weak?"

The strange thing is, now that the pain ended, I feel fine. Great even. The smart part of my brain, probably Dexter's part, told me to stay down and trick them.

I slowly looked down, trying my best to look defeated. I heard footsteps, the Lobe's to be specific, come towards me. _Now's your chance Freak!_

I kicked them to the far side of the cage, where they landed in a heap. I casually walked out and locked the door, trapping them in their own trap.

Soon the police arrived and took away the Lobe and Gutierrez. So Cosgrove, Steff, and I went out to celebrate another victory with ice cream.

While enjoying my cold treat something about the machine the Lobe used bothered me. _The Lobe__'s inventions have never not worked before _I thought _maybe I just got lucky?_

I looked back down at my ice cream, shrugged, and continued eating the cold delicious, delectable, and delightful thing of yumminess, pushing my previous worries to the back of my head…

**Tell me what you think!**


	3. Chapter 3

**_Flash back…_**** Time for bed, I'm sooooo tired (goes into bed) good night… wait a second… INSPIRATION FOR STORY! (Jumps up and down) _end of flash back…_ yep, that's pretty much what happened. Once again thank you to those who reviewed (cough cough Freakazette Raven cough cough) you guys make my day!**

**Do I have too? Awwwww (sighs) fine… I do not own Freakazoid…**

**Freakaless!**

**Ch. 3 Awww, Nutbunnies**

**Third Person**

"I don't understand!" said the Lobe while looking over machines blueprints, "It should have worked! My inventions always work!"

"It didn't work because you, my friend, are a weenie!"

"I am not a w-WAIT!"

"What is it?"

"It DID work… it just hasn't kicked in yet!" the Lobe said excitedly

"What do you mean _it hasn't kicked in yet_?" Gutierrez questioned.

"I mean that in, at least, 48 hours Freakazoid's power will be completely gone!"

Gutierrez's eyes widened, "Will he be able to change into Freakazoid?"

"Well, um yes, but he'll be completely powerless!"

"Then we will need to escape in less than 48 hours…"

**Freakazoid's POV**

**_The day after being shot with laser thingy ma bob…_**

I have a _slight_ problem… today while I was saving some people some of my powers stopped working! Like while I was fighting Cobra Queen's snakes my super strength just disappeared! And when I started chasing Longhorn my super speed suddenly went out! Feeling depressed, I said Freak in and changed back into Dexter, and thought about what had happened. _Maybe I'm getting sick…_ suddenly Dexter's thoughts came through, kind of like a phone.

"You okay Freak?" _I don't know… My powers aren't working for some reason; do you think I'm sick? _

"I don't know, maybe…"

**_The next day after school…_**

Three times. Dexter had to say Freak out _three _times before he fully changed into me. And now that he finally has, I kinda wish he didn't… I feel horrible. Now I_ know_ something's wrong with me. _I need to find Cosgrove…_ I shakily got up and went into the Freakmobile.

I found him a few minutes later, which was good because I felt like I was going to pass out. He took me to the hospital.

I now feel worse than I did when Gutierrez cut off my power supply, which is saying something. The doctor once again says I'm completely normal, but I'm starting to think that's the problem.

I told Cosgrove to contact Roddy right before I passed out.

**_3 hours later…_**

_Kid…_

_Kid, wake up…_

"Huh?"

"Kid, get up. You changed back while you were sleeping."

I looked down, shocked to see that he was right, I wasn't Freakazoid I was Dexter. I also was shocked to see the hospital door barricaded.

"One of the doctors was trying to come in to check on you."

I nodded, "Freak Out!" exhaustion came over me as I changed back, I fought the urge to fall back asleep and turn into Dexter. _What's wrong with me?_ While pondering this I heard a very familiar Scotsman's voice yelling on the other side of the door, Roddy. Cosgrove walked over and let him inside before barricading the door in case I changed back to Dexter again.

"Hello lad, how are you feeling?" Roddy asked.

"Horrible. What's wrong with me? Did Gutierrez cut off my power supply again?"

"That's the thing; I don't know what's wrong with you."

I tried to ask another question, but as soon as I opened my mouth two people crashed through the window! Roddy and Cosgrove were quickly taken down. I shakily got up to try and help them only to fall back onto my face. I heard heavy footsteps come towards me, and was quickly picked up by my hair, bringing me face to face with cave guy.

"Hello Freakazoid, you're coming with me."

I tried to fight his grip, but it was useless in my condition.

"Come on Longhorn, We need to get Freakazoid to his appointment." He laughed snootily as he carried me away and towards who knows where.

**_Five minutes later…_**

"Wow, you really are weak. Aren't you? You haven't even done one skit!" Cave Guy said, though to be more specific, I haven't spoken at all, I'm surprised I'm still awake. All I want to do right now, is go home, freak in, and rest in the Freakazone until this whole thing blows over…

Cave Guy tossed me into a small cage; I hit the side of it like a rag doll, and fell to the ground, unable to move.

"HA! I told you it would work!" said someone I assumed was the Lobe. "Take it back."

"Okay fine… You are not a weenie. Now can we get back to mocking him please?" said Gutierrez… I think…

"Hello again Freakazoid," I looked up to see Gutierrez saunter inside. "How are you feeling my friend?" he smiled evilly.

"I… Knew it… Was you…"

CAPTION: NO HE DIDN'T!

His grin widened, "You… are such… a weenie…" his smile quickly turned upside down, "I AM NOT A WEENIE!" he picked me up by my costume and through me against the cage wall, "YOU ARE THE WEENIE!" _Ow…_ I began to black out. _No! Not here! Come on Freak! Stay awake!_ But it was too late I slowly slipped out of consciousness. _I just hope I don't change back to Dexter_

I spun around as I turned back into Dexter.

_Awww nutbunnies…_

**Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey! Sorry for the wait, even if only one person is waiting, sorry about it. I was moving so I've been really busy lately, had tons of homework, and I had a HUGE writers block****…**** Also don't worry****,**** I don't believe in discontinuing stories if at least one person likes it, but I will have extended brakes occasionally. Though I desperately wish it, I do not own Freakazoid****.**

**Freakaless!**

**Ch. 4 Some Explaining to Do**

**Third Person**

The villains looked in pure shock at the nerdy kid sprawled in the middle of the cage. They sat there for a few minutes, just staring at the insane hero (who _always_ beat them) looking almost dead on the floor in his alter ego form.

Finally the Lobe broke the silence, "You, you mean this entire time-"

"This entire time the guy who's been sendin us to jail was a NERD!" Long Horn finished.

"You didn't know that?" Gutierrez asked.

"No, Did you?"

"Yes, of course. I'm actually the first villain he fought."

"I thought I was." Cave Guy said.

"No, that's just what order the episodes in the show were in. After he discovered how to use his powers he fought me."

"Well why didn't you tell us his identity?" asked the Lobe.

"I thought you knew, my friend."

"Well, I guess since you didn't know it's okay… Now that we know who he is and he's powerless, what are we supposed to do?" the lobe questioned.

The villains pondered this, what should they do?

"We could always go steal stuff since he can't stop us now." Cave Guy said.

"Ya, I like yer idea." Long Horn replied.

"But someone should stay and watch him. I would, my friend, but I have some important business elsewhere." Said Gutierrez.

"He's right, how about we take turns watching him?" "Good idea Cave Guy, I guess I'll take the first watch." Said the Lobe.

So Cave Guy and Long Horn went to go steal stuff, Gutierrez went somewhere else that we will not know about until later, and the Lobe stayed to watch Freakazoid.

A few minutes later he began to wake up.

**Freakazoid's POV**

I felt my eyes slowly open up, I looked around, I was inside the Freakalair. _How did I get here?_ Then I remembered what had happened. I changed back to Dexter in front of most of my enemies. I must still be Dexter…

**Dexter's POV**

**Freakazoid's thoughts are in **_**Italic Bold**_

I woke up to see the Lobe through cage bars. He looked pretty mad for some reason…

"How is it possible that this entire time not only were you an incompetent fool but you were also a nerd!" he shouted.

_He sounds like he knows who I am._ I looked down, _Awww man not again! Why do I keep changing back? __**I don't know! I'm just as confused as you are. Hey, do you feel sick? **__No, why? __**That's weird… I don't feel sick either. **__That is weird… maybe the sickness only comes when I'm you? __**Maybe… I do feel funny though… **__what do you mean? __**Holy crap! **__What! What is it! __**I-I… **__You what! __**I can't remember random things from the internet! **__What! What do mean you can't remember random things from the internet! __**Tell me, do I sound weird to you! **__What? No you sound completely… _Oh my God…_ no-normal, y-you sound normal! __**What's wrong with me? **__I don't know Freak, I just don't know…_

"Hello! Are you even listening to me Freakazoid?"

I snapped out of my conversation with Freak, "Huh?"

The Lobe groaned, "Apparently not, I was saying that you have to do some explaining."

"Well, um-"

"Your voice sounds different too?"

I ignored his question, "Well what do mean by answers?"

He rolled his eyes, "I mean, how a nerd like you defeat all of Washington D.C.'s greatest villains?"

"Oh… well technically I didn't defeat you guys Freak did."

"Are you saying you aren't Freakazoid?"

I bit my lip, _how do I explain this? _"Well, I am and I'm not…"

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Well, it's kind of like me and Freak have different brains but share the same body…"

He nodded his head, showing me he understood what I was saying. Just then Long Horn and Cave Guy came in with bags that are most likely filled with money.

"Good, yer awake. You've got some explainin to do."

I sighed. This is going to be a long day…

**Don't forget to review!**


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